tagline
About About Services
mcm banner

August 2008

Understanding Men by David Murrow why men
(excerpts from the book "Why Men Hate Going to Church")

Leadership and the Masculine Spirit - Part 3

We continue this month with Murrow's final thoughts on church leadership.

Men Need Vision

The Bible says, "Without a vision, the people perish." Men are the ones perishing spiritually today. Every man longs to live a significant life. Men want to be part of something greater than themselves. But men are reluctant to surrender to God because they don't know what He is doing in the world, and they have no idea how they might get in on it.

Jesus had a vision. He called it the kingdom of God. It wasw huge. It involved nothing less than a re-creation of the world, one person at a time. And we are His partners in this task.

If men don't have a vision of what God is doing in a church, they will not invest themselves. They will see it as a club, not a cause. Christianity either becomes an exercise in moral improvement or pointless busyness. But with vision even menial tasks can become meaningful.

Where does vision come from? God! God is calling each believer, each church, to accomp;lish something great, but few are listening. There are 340,000 churches in America, each one doing just about the same things every other church is doing. What if your church did one thing and did it well? Something unique, specific, detailed, and God-given? Paul told us that Christ's body is made up of many parts, each with a unique function. That unique function is your purpose.

Men Need Purpose

Two women will go out to lunch without an agenda, but two men won't. Men won't do anything unless they know the purpose.

The problem is, most guys don't know what the purpose of church is. Really! That's because most churches have not agreed on what their purpose is. This is why men love Rick Warren's Purpose-Driven book series. Men are purpose driven. If you can clearly state a unique purpose for your church (and restate it often), the men will be encouraged. What can you do?

  • Try to make church mission statements short and specific.
  • Once you have your mission or purpose, repeat it frequently to the body, at least once a month.
  • Always stress the purpose when announcing events.
  • When starting small groups for men, be sure they have a purpose to focus on.
  • Cancel purposeless meetings.

Give Men High Standards: Ask Something of Them

Many people think the church asks too much of its members. In reality, it asks too little. Thom Rainer studied two thousand churches and found that without exception the churches that attracted unchurched people were high-expectation churches.

Resesarch from Dr. Chris Bader of Baylor University supports this idea: "Groups that are growing in membership are the ones that require more of their members." Rick Warren built Saddleback Church on this philosophy: "Ask confidently for a big commitment. Jesus always asked for commitment clearly and confidently. He ws not at all reluctant to ask men and women to drop everything and follow him." Warren adds, "People do not resent being asked for a great commitment if there is a great purpose behind it."

We are afraid to ask men for a great commitment, so they think we're after their wallets, not their hearts. We plug them into the ministry machine, but forget to show them how their contribution is making an eternal difference.

Promise Men Obstacles, Not Ease

Bruce Barton writes, "The higher type of leadership which calls forth men's greatest energies by the promise of obstacles rather than the picture of rewards - that was the leadership of Jesus. By it he tempered the soft metal of his disciples' nature into keen hard steel."

There is a kind of high-octane man who will not follow unless he sees danger ahead. Jesus knew this. If we want aggressive, bold, greatness-seeking men, we must do what Jesus did and promise suffering, trial, and pain. But today's Christianity is marketed like Tylenol: it's the antidote to suffering, trial, and pain. We've turned Jesus' approach on its head!

Don't Beg or Plead

Jesus never begged anyone to follow Him. He never waited for anyone, never sang one more verse while people decided whether to follow. He barked, "Follow Me!" and kept going. Those who immediately dropped everything became His Disciples; those who hesitated were left behind.

Yet week after week, especially in evangelical churches, we beg men to be saved. Instead of pleading, what if our approach was: "Do you have what it takes to follow Christ? Many say they do, but fewer than one in four will remain loyal. Are you one of the few, or when rials come, will you crumble?"

These approaches are risky and should be employed only with prayer. I would not use them with mixed-gender audiences. But a sharp-edged gospel may be the only way to pierce the hearts of some men.

Men Need to Produce Fruit

If you want to demorallize a man, give him a pointless task. Men have to be productive. Jesus prayed we would produe an abundant crop, thirty, sixty, even a hundredfold. A man's strongest urge is to reproduce.

While some churches are producing abundant fruit, the sad truth is, many are not. I think it's safe to say most U.S. congregations are not having the impact God wants them to have. We are not reaping the crop of transformed lives that Jesus promised.

Why do our churches produce so little fruit? Of course there are the spiritual reasons - a lack of prayer, faith, abiding, trust, etc. But even faithful, praying churches sometimes fail to produce an abundant crop beacause they're afraid to take a painful but necessary step: thinning their ministry programs.

Thinning: The Missing Step in Fruit Production

Sadly, many of our churches look good on the surface, but are producing a meager crop. This is because we do too much. Over the years we plant new programs but never thin the less effective ones. So our roster of ministries grows and grows. Soon, like crowded carrots starving for nutrients, church programs begin starving for volunteers. Understaffed ministries become less and less effective. Men sense the pointlessness of it all and drop out, leaving women to do all the work.

Still we fail to scale back or eliminate unfruitful programs. Instead, we keep programs alive long past their useful lives, in order to keep people happy. But, in trying to be everything to everyone, we fail to produce a crop.

How do you thin your ministries? Fellowship Bible Church in Arkansas evaluates all its ministry activities for fruitfulness; it drops the bottom 10 percent each year. There are no sacred cows; any ministry that's not changing lives is subject to the chopping block. Rick Warren of Saddleback is more direct: "Kill any program that doesn't fulfill a purpose." Jeuss said, "He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful." (John 15:2 NIV). Do we have the courage to treat our church programs this way?

Thinning your ministry offering hurts, and you can count on resistance from well-meaning Christians. So why do it? Because men need to produce fruit. If we plug men into fruitless ministry activity, they will burn out and either go passive or leave the church.No longer will men sacrifice themselves to support an institution. But a church that's changing the world will draw men like a beacon.

It takes strong, courageous leadership to do these things. But you can do it. Give your congregational leaders unflaggin gsupport when unfruitful programs are thinned. Give them a vision for what thee changes can accomplish. Make the tough choices. And lead courageously.

Read the other articles in this issue:

Learn more about our FREE 45 day "Quick Start" program. Contact us today!



Think you need OCM's assistance? Read more.

© 2006-2008 Outdoor Connection Ministries. All Rights Reserved.